5. andy pettitte - yesterday yankees pitcher andy pettitte held a press conference to talk about his use of human growth hormone. for an hour or so, he answered any and all questions regarding his past use while taking the opportunity to apologize profusely to everyone. and although pettitte didn't address what he told congress regarding roger clemens, it still seems like he's coming out smelling like roses. or at least smelling like a different flower that didn't smell as good as roses and was forced to take hgh out of desperation. anyways, generally these press conferences involve players apologizing without once mentioning what they did. so to me, it's very refreshing to see a player being so candid. unfortunately, we're in an era where it's safe to assume that this high a level of candidness this late in one's career is likely due to steroids.
4. a fool and his money - with no nba games scheduled and with no new episode of american gladiators monday night, college basketball was the only game in town, unless your town watches hockey. mine does not. anyways, last night featured a texas-texas a&m game that was a longhorn blowout and a hard fought louisville win over an up and down syracuse team. additionally, georgetown won, xavier won, and saint mary's won. i could go in more depth about what happened in each game, but come march madness it won't matter. especially because i've already decided to bet on st mary's under any circumstances.
3. eric gagne's family - yesterday former cy young winner eric gagne, apparently unimpressed by andy pettitte, apologized to his family, friends, and teammates for being a distraction. yet for whatever reason, he failed to address why he was being a distraction, which is becoming a common practice for baseball players facing steroid accusations. it's quite a leap of faith to take this brief statement as a tacit admission of guilt, but what else can we infer if he refuses to elaborate? anyways, since these statements are so trendy, the most interesting thing i got from gagne's apology was the fact that from what i can tell, he didn't mention his fans. i think it's fair to assume this is a tacit admission that he has no fans.2. nick fazekas - last week when the initial jason kidd trade was announced nick fazekas was probably more than a little excited that the future hall of famer was joining the mavericks. but thanks to saboteurs jerry stackhouse and devean george, the trade had to be reconfigured. and unfortunately, a fazekas-kidd duo just wasn't in the stars. in fact, it doesn't appear a fazekas-any dallas maverick duo is in the stars because tomorrow nick fazekas is expected to be cut in order to make room on the roster for keith van horn who will be immediately traded to the nets. so not a week after buying a jason kidd fat head, fazekas is now unemployed. and because of this, i expect tomorrow, jerry stackhouse and devean george will both receive nice going away presents from nick fazekas. presents that involve their cars being towed.
1. college football players getting suspended six months before the season starts - lsu back-up quarterback ryan perrilloux was suspended indefinitely yesterday for the always ambiguous "violation of team rules". naturally, an explanation this vague invites wild speculation as to which team rule was violated. my money's on rule 3, "don't tickle coach miles". in a similar story about a far less important player, tennessee punter britton colquitt was suspended for five games and had his scholarship rescinded for a recent arrest on charges of driving under the influence and leaving the scene of an accident. these were both violations of tennessee's team rules and also violations of the law's rules. interestingly, britton is the younger brother of nfl punter dustin colquitt and is apparently the fourth member of his family to punt for the volunteers. and if i had to deal with the incessant text messages from my family telling me to "punt it farther next time" or "remember: don't outkick your coverage, love mom" i'd probably drink excessively too.
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