Pat White is the best player in the nation - Pat White led his West Virginia Mountaineers directly into the talk for National Championship candidacy with a dominating performance against the Connecticut Huskies on Saturday. The quarterback threw for 1 TD and ran for 186 yards and two more TDs en-route to a 66-21 steamrolling of a surprise Huskies team. In the meantime, White bolstered his Heisman candidacy; prompting Connecticut coach Randy Edsall to endorse White for the award. Its kind of like nominating the person who just assaulted and battered you for a good Samaritan award. Either way, White's disgusting, team leading, 1,144 rushing yards to go along with his 1,498 passing yards from the QB position as well as his team's position in the rankings, gives white a legitimate chance of winning the coveted Heisman hardware.
Wait, Darren McFadden is the best player in the nation - In the best game of the week, if Darren McFadden didn't prove why he is Heisman worthy, he most definitely proved why he should be the hands down number one pick in the 2008 NFL draft. The three overtime thriller ended with LSU's QB Matt Flynn throeing a crippling interception in the end-zone while trying to convert a mandatory 2pt conversion. McFadden ran for 206 yards and 3 TDS and took the snap directly several times even throwing a TD. This performance not only upended the number one team in the nation, but also put Ricky Williams on notice that hes going to have a new running mate in the backfield next year.
But, what about that guy in Hawaii? - Colt Brennan kept his name squarely within the Heisman discussion with his performance in toppling last year's WAC champions, Boise State in Hawaii's 39 -27 win. Brennan threw for six yards short of 500 and 5 TDS in breaking BYU's Ty Detmer's mark for career passing touchdowns. Brennan cruised past the record when he threw his 122nd TD pass in the first quarter and now sits at 126. While Brennan is a longshot to win the Heisman, the Warriors are one win away from securing a second BCS game bid for the WAC. Hawaii faces Washington in their final regular season game.
All that is irrelevant because Tim Tebow is winning the Heisman - Tim Tebow is making it awfully hard for voters to not make him the Heisman winner as he now has accounted for 51 of Florida's TDs throwing for 3 and running for another 2 against in-state rival Florida State. Personally I have a personal gripe with Tebow, as he ruined Chris Leak's chance of being recognized as "the guy" who led Florida to their National Championship last year, but it's kind of hard to argue with his numbers and his leadership of this team. While they will most likely fall short of receiving a BCS invitation, Tebow is probably the most deserving candidate and if his success continues in future seasons, voters won't be able to hide behind the fact that he is an underclassman.
Missouri must be stopped - I was going to comment on the travesty that the winner of the Kansas Missouri game this past weekend will have a very good chance of being in the National Title game, but I like probably most of our readers was in a turkey comma for most of the weekend. Regardless, the winner turned out to be Missouri and while I like the Cinderella story as much as the next guy who really wants to sit down and watch either of these teams in the National Championship? There would be no Vince Young vs. USC, there wont be a Heisman lock vying for team hardware, it would basically be Missouri or Kansas getting trounced by another team that happens not to be in the very disappointing Big 12. Now we have to hope that another Big 12 team, Oklahoma, steps up and cuts Missouri off at the pass in the Big 12 championship game, so hopefully we see West Virginia vs. Ohio State or some other bearable, star-filled BCS championship.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Heismania - 11.25.07
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Yesterday's Best 11.19.07
5. Michael Beasley -Michael Beasley continued his dazzling display of dominance in the college ranks by notching his second game of over 20 points and 20 rebounds. Against Western Illinois on Saturday, Beasley grabbed 22 boards to go along with his 28 points and is now averaging an even 30 points and 20 rebounds on the season. That's way too many points and rebounds for a freshman, and at this point I demand a full investigation to see how old this guy really is.
4. Jimmie Johnson - The most popular American male name is James, which is often colloquially changed to Jim or Jimmie. Johnson is the second most common surname. I think I have figured out why NASCAR has such an undeservedly huge following, its because apparently the best performer Jimmie Johnson the two time Nextel Cup champion, has that same name as half the population in America. While my last name is surely not popular, I have to admit that I have some kind of subjective affinity to players named Joe. If someone actually had my name and was some kind of superstar athlete, I'm pretty sure I'd be a fan. Then again, I'd probably also spend an exorbitant amount of time pretending that I was that person to get into clubs, get things comped and try to impress women.
3. Orlando Magic - The Orlando Magic snapped the Celtics unbeaten streak on Sunday, beating the big three 104-102 and proving that the Celtics do bleed real blood. The Celtics came back furiously from a 17 point halftime deficit, but came up short when Paul Peirce missed a jumper as time ran out. Orlando used a strong team approach, as they didn't have any startling lines in the box-score, they also took advantage of sloppy play by the Celtics who committed 19 turnovers and sent the Magic to the foul line 44 times compared to their 26 attempts.
2. Tom Glavine - Tom Glavine, the backstabbing member of the Mets pitching staff has finally found happiness with his ex-team, the Atlanta Braves. Glavine spent five unimpressive years with the Mets compiling a record of 61 and 56 and shared mutual unappreciation with the city of New York. Last year during his chase of 300 wins, we endured Glavine's uneasy address of Met fans at Shea, not to mention more face-time for Tom Glavine's wife than that of the entire Met infield. Glavine's Met tenure culminated with the second worst outing of his career when the Mets needed him the most, giving up 5 hits 2 walks, and 7 earned runs in a third of an inning. There is no way that the hall-of-fame pitcher did this unintentionally as he probably already had visions of more tee-times with his BFF John Smoltz on his mind.
1. Houston Dynamo - Don't know much about soccer but I do know that with the Houston Dynamo defeating the New England Revolution 2-1 to win theMLS championship on Sunday, that they have prevented the New England area's bid for a clean sweep of every American team sport championship. Everyone was getting a little tired of NewEnglanders walking around so smuggly , and it's good to know that we as a nation have this Revolution defeat in our back-pockets. Although if it ever came to us having to use it I wonder what would be more annoying, Boston fans, or us resorting to using soccer as a valid American sports argument.
Monday, November 19, 2007
The End Around - 11.18.07
Colts Rebound - A week after missing the game-winning 25-yard field goal last week against the Chargers, Adam Vinatieri redeemed himself by kicking the game-winning 24-yard field goal this week against the Chiefs. Redeemed himself is probably a poor word choice. How about, "did his only job as an NFL kicker"? Either way, the Colts ended their two game losing streak and thanks in part to a Steelers' loss, appear to be in good position to secure a first-round bye in the playoffs. Surprisingly, the Indianapolis defense was impressive against the Brodie Croyle and Priest Holmes-led Chiefs despite losing Dwight Freeney for the year. We can point the finger to the Colts' newest acquisition, Simeon Rice, who tackled zero people, which was the same number of tackles Freeney made this week. An adequate replacement by all accounts.
Moss v. Owens - To no one surprise, the NFL's two top wide receivers this year continued their fantastic seasons. Owens flew by a depleted Redskins secondary for 173 yards and four touchdowns on eight receptions and the Cowboys held on to win, 28-23. Then later that night, Moss answered with 10 catches, 128 yards, and an identical four touchdowns as the Patriots toppled the Bills 56-10. As football fans, we can only hope that this continues for the remaining season so we can bare witness to a brewing rivalry unseen since Bird v. Magic or Spy v. Spy or Brown v. the Board of Education or Alien v. Predator.On Second Thought - In a controversial game in Baltimore, the new Browns beat the old Browns 33-30 in overtime. This game featured a 51-yard field goal at the end of regulation by Phil Dawson that first ended the game and then later sent the game into overtime. The kick in question bounced off the upright, bounced on another crossbar, and then bounced into the end zone. The refs originally called the kick no good, but on insistence of another ref the kick was called yes good because it hit the support behind the field goal uprights. Players from both teams were ushered back onto the field, celebratory handshakes were revoked, and overtime began and eventually ended on a Cleveland field goal. I don't understand what the controversy was about. If Phil Dawson missed the field goal but tucked the ball before he kicked it wide right and the refs let him kick it again because of the tuck rule that would have been controversial. Or if Phil Dawson called a timeout before the kick to ice himself and kicked it anyways that would have been controversial. Or even if the holder moved the ball as Phil Dawson was about to kick it like in Peanuts cartoons that would have been controversial. But Phil Dawson made the field goal and the refs made the right call. Seemed perfectly versial to me.
Miami D'ohphins - The football season started September 6th and the Dolphins have won zero games. The basketball season started just about two weeks ago and no team has failed to win a game. Is it fair to compare these two sports? Probably not. But is it fair to let the other football teams play football against the Dolphins? Absolutely not. But Miami continues it's march towards infamy with yesterday's loss against the Eagles which was particularly distressing for Dolphin's fans. Because after taking a 7-0, the Dolphins squandered their best chance at winning by injuring Donovan McNabb halfway through the 2nd quarter. McNabb had accumulated -1 fantasy points and in 11 attempts he had only completed five passes, three to his teammates and two to the Dolphins. The Dolphins foolishly sprained McNabb's ankle and backup quarterback AJ Feeley led the Eagles to 17 unanswered points while Dolphins' starting kicker Jay Feely could only watch. Next up for the woeful Dolphins are the Pittsburgh Steelers who Miami hopes would like nothing better than to follow up a loss to the Jets with another loss.
Hire Norv Turner - Most of the headlines coming from the Chargers/Jaguars game yesterday will be about San Diego dropping their 5th game of the season by losing 24-17 in Jacksonville. We'll probably read about the ineptitude of one Norvit Turner even though the Jags won the game moreso than the Chargers lost it thanks to solid defense and continued mistake-free quarterbacking from David Garrard. Unfortunately, I'm no trendsetter. Norv has turned a 14-2 offensive juggernaut into a team who plays .500 football and gives LaDainian Tomlinson 16 carries when he should have closer to 116. And as a result, firenorvturner websites have appeared demanding his head. I've never been a fan of these websites since I'm not a fan of firing someone from a job and threatening their family's financial security. This is why I'm insted spear-heading the Hire Norv Turner movement. Perhaps if we help him find another job he's more suited for, he might just leave on his own. And with this end in mind, I've sent his reusme to numerous companies with job openings on Monster. By this time next week, Norv Turner will likely resign from his position of NFL coach and become a Systems Analyst at Lockheed Martin or a Sandwich Engineer at Subway or a Home Maker at Norv Turner's home.Freshman Fifteen
We tried phrasing this in a way that wouldn't sound creepy, but there's no way to avoid it: we love freshmen. With graduation, early entrants and transfers, college basketball is in a constant state of flux. While the importance of veteran leadership can't be overlooked, an incoming freshman class can totally change the outlook for a team's season. So the three of us came up with an idea in which we each draft five freshmen from across the country, track their fantasy stats, and compete against each other every week. We're still working out the details (making this up as we go along) but we've laid the groundwork for a challenge we call The Freshman Fifteen. Stats are compiled from Monday to Sunday each week beginning today, and the fantasy categories are points, rebounds, assists, blocks, steals, fg%, ft% and 3-pointers made.
To fully appreciate how stupid this idea is, you have to understand how we determined the draft order. The three of us were on the phone together and we held a rock-paper-scissors tournament by yelling our choices at the same time. For some reason, this was incredibly difficult. It led to lots of confusion over when we were supposed to yell and several blatant attempts to cheat. Once it was over, Joe got to choose his draft spot first, followed by Quang and Dhivy.
Draft Results:
Michael Beasley (d)
Derrick Rose (j)
OJ Mayo (q)
Eric Gordon (q)
Johnny Flynn (j)
Kyle Singler (d)
Kevin Love (d)
Jerryd Bayless (j)
Donte Green (q)
DeAndre Jordan (q)
Patrick Patterson (j)
Nick Calathes (d)
Kosta Koufos (d)
Justin Burrell (j)
Anthony Randolph (q)
Dhivy:
Joe made an ill-advised decision and took the middle pick, while Quang foolishly selected the third pick. This gave me free run at rivals.com top freshman, Michael Beasley. His early numbers at K-State are bananas, so imagine how good he'll be once he…ripens? My only concern in making him the number one pick was how creepy this picture of him at the McDonald's All-American game was. That is by far the fattest Ronald McDonald I've ever seen. Probably because he eats so much McDonalds. Anyhoo, after Joe and Quang bumbled their picks, I quickly selected Kyle Singler and Kevin Love. Singler was the top ranked small forward out of high school, and should get plenty of open looks and steals at Duke. Love has the post moves to dominate the Pac 10 and UCLA will benefit from his defensive skills as well. This gave me a formidable front court, but I was sorely lacking in assists and was forced to reach for a guard with my next pick. I knew nothing about Nick Calathes, but based on the SportsCenter highlights I saw this morning, he's the next coming of Bobby Hurley. At least that's what I lie awake telling myself when I realize I lost out on one of the elite guards. I could've tried to find another backcourt player, but instead I solidified my stranglehold of big men by selecting Kosta Koufos from Ohio State. Quang immediately commented that my team was very white. You know what else is white? Snow. This is appropriate, because winter is coming soon and my team has prepared for the arduous months ahead. Quang and Joe on the other hand, have frittered their time away and are sure to freeze to death. On paper, my team looks like a lock to win rebounds, blocks and FG% every week. If I can get contributions elsewhere, it might be enough to prove that Joe & Quang are merely redshirts, while I am the MOP of this tournament.
Joe:
This team is not composed of the players that I typically like, there are way too many unselfish players on this squad and if this was a real team they would routinely pass away the 35 second shot clock. However there is so much talent and potential that I am beyond confident that I will win this competition easily. My first pick Derrick Rose is a player who could dominate and take over a game, but is very content to get his teammates involved, play defense and help clean up on the the glass. With Quang making a fish stick sandwich (get it... Gordon and Mayo....I'm so lame) I decided to pick up Johnny Flynn with my second pick, because i saw him drop 28 points and dish out 9 assists in his first game against Sienna. Quang scooped up two of the big men that I thought i was going to get, out of spite i picked up a THIRD awesome point guard, Jerryd Bayless who is more shoot-first than the other two guards and should be able to get me lots of points in a fast paced Arizona offense. To try and salvage my front line I was able to get Pat Patterson from Kentucky, a skilled 6'8forward who played alongside O.J. Mayo so he must be awesome. My final pick, Justin Burrell out of St. Johns is another 6'8 forward, who is strong and athletic enough to give me a presence in the rebounds and blocks categories. Yes, Burrell is only on the team because he is on St. Johns and I am a giant New York homer, but with a youth movement in Queens, Burrell should get major minutes and produce. These guys have no chance against me!
Quang:
i couldn't have constructed this team any better if i were nick nolte in blue chips. and as such, my success in this league is as assured as if i were nick nolte in blue chips. first of all, dhivy and joe foolishly let oj mayo slip to the last pick in the first round. dhivy may not be a fan of oj, but that's because "the man" has already gotten to him. i, on the other hand, have not been gotten to and therefore think oj mayo is going to have an incredible year. with my next pick it was obvious that eric gordon was the best talent left on the board so i quickly snatched him up. if we were using "controversy" as a stat category this would be a wrap. but sadly we are not. so with my 3rd and 4th round picks i selected syracuse small forward donte green and texas a&m center deandre jordan. green is tall, long, and lanky and he shoots very well while jordan is one of the dying breed of big men who actually play big. i expect them to be quite a handful for dhivy's and joe's teams. rounding out my team is lsu forward anthony randolph, who i made mr. irrelevant by selecting him with the last pick of the draft. i anticipate he's going to be the newest athletic lsu forward who doesn't do anything but dunk and block shots. these are skills that should translate very well onto my team and the system i run, specifically the "do whatever you want" system. in summary, this is a very impressive five man team. so impressive that i expect my two opponents will quit halfway through the season citing reasons like "your team makes too many threes" or "this league doesn't make any sense". regardless, not only am i certain that my team and i will win this league, i'm also certain that a nobel peace prize for basketball achievement is in our immediate future.
Whose team do you think will win? Who got the steal/bust of the draft? Go to our comments section to voice your opinion. If you take the 'pi' out of 'opinion', you get the word 'onion'.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Today's Best - 11.15.07
went and got himself indicted. now, instead of getting sick air and shredding maximum snow he's forced to don his sick suit and shred this story for the next six months. while we at garbage points are not going to jump to any conclusions about bonds' guilt or innocence, the evidence clearly shows that roger is 100% guilty: of being gnarly.4. dennis dixon - college football's bermuda triangle-like mystery surrounding it's number two ranking continued this year, as the oregon ducks lost in tucson to arizona 34-24. early in the game, quarterback dennis dixon injured his knee and the ducks weren't able to recover as brady leaf, ryan leaf's brother, took over. i guess the leaf doesn't fall far from the tree? save your boos for the rest of the list. anyways, oregon lost and now dixon's status for the rest of the season is in doubt. this likely means he is no longer the leading candidate for the heisman, but fortunately this also means he will not become the next victim of the heisman curse. somewhere yahoo! sports is furious.
3.
scott boras - a-rod has agreed to an outline of a 10-year, $275 million contract with the yankees, according to reports. they are also working on the details of a clause that would allow alex to share in the marginal revenue created by his home run chase. interestingly, this was achieved without the aid of his agent scott boras who was not a part of the contract negotiations. this means scott boras is going to get about $20-30 million for not helping alex rodriguez. i've never helped alex rodriguez and all i have to show for it is this briefcase and this haircut.2. sixth men - the spurs and mavericks were one of two nba games last night and dallas made a bold statement winning 105-92. in a post game press conference, it was revealed that the specific statement was "hey spurs, we won!" the game also pitted two of the leading sixth men candidates, horse manure ginobili and jason manure terry. ginobili finished with 25 points and added nine rebounds and seven assists while jason terry score 18 points on 7-9 shooting including 4 of 5 from three. it's apparent that both are very good players who obviously are talented enough to start, but their coaches have decided to chase awards instead of wins. and for this game at least, it looks like jason terry won the battle improving him to fifth and half man.
1. jake peavy - in a season where he joined randy johnson, doc gooden, and steve carlton as the only nl pitchers to lead the league in wins, era, and strikeouts, yesterday jake peavy was announced as the unanimous winner of the nl cy young. however, the unanimous victory should be taken with a grain of salt. because if in addition to the baseball writers' association of america, major league baseball allowed the arizona diamondbacks to vote, it's likely that last year's nl cy young, brandon webb, would have stolen a few first place votes. but that isn't the case and jake peavy becomes the 12th nl pitcher to be a unanimous selection. though i wonder if he would trade it in for a playoff berth the padres frittered away down the stretch. i'm not sure if there are pawn shops out there that offer playoff berths so i guess it's a moot point.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Joey Porter Hates America
if you're like me, you don't like joey porter. though if you're like joey porter, you're a miserable football player and a big fat jerk. and if that's the case, i don't like you or your horse-killing dogs or your six friends who helped you gang up on levi jones either. thankfully, karma has been restored, and this year joey porter is playing a key role on the winless miami dolphins, much to my delight. he has been so inconsequential thus far that we haven't really heard anything about him since he guranteed a victory against the raiders in week 4. this was a game the dolphins
lost by 18 points while allowing daunte culpepper to rush for three scores and pass for another two. strangely, neither the dolphins nor the raiders have won since this game, which further proves my theory that joey porter ruins things.
but finally, the point. as you may know, ricky williams was recently reinstated by the league and has been spotted around the dolphins' complex. this is either what the dolphins call their training facility or the psychological phenomena that causes them to do things like not drafting brady quinn, trading for a pre-concussed trent green, and letting mercury morris answer questions about teams who could go undefeated. either way, for illogical reasons only beknownst to them, someone decided to ask joey porter what he thought about this, specifically whether he'd accept ricky williams back onto the team. porter's response was enlightening.
"Yeah I would. We're 0-9. I'd welcome bin Laden if he could run the ball like Ricky did."i don't even know where to begin. how about: "if you're like me, you don't like joey porter. though if you're like joey porter, you think letting terrorists play for your football your team is a good idea." it's never a good sign when the person who is 3rd on the fbi's most wanted fugitive list is first on your team's most wanted running back list. but fortunately for the dolphins and the united states and the people that run the
terror alert scale who would have had to start using colors from 64-packs of crayloa crayons if osama bin laden played football, joey porter doesn't make the decisions in miami. because if he did, not only would our current threat level rise to cerulean or burnt sienna or razzle dazzle rose, but the dolphins would also field a team consisting of bin laden, john wilkes booth, cruella de vil, and the ebola virus. and instead of punting on fourth downs, the dolphins would always run trick plays where they burn flags and root against brett favre. it would be madness.
anyways, it's obvious that joey porter wasn't seriously considering flying bin laden in for a tryout, but i'm mocked outraged the same. mainly because i don't like joey porter. but for his sake, i'm hopeful that joey porter's wish of playing football with osama bin laden comes true. when roger goodell bans him from the nfl forever because of these inane comments, forcing him to sign with the al-qaeda terminaedas. if not, joey porter will continue to play in the nfl against true americans. the terrorists have already won.Today's Best 11.14.07
5. Ricky Williams - Maybe third times a charm. Ricky Williams has been reinstated once again to the NFL after serving his second ban for marijuana use. The 0-8 Miami Dolphins have an interesting decision to make now that the former bruising back is available. The Dolphins have already indicated that they are entering operation 0-16 full steam ahead by announcing that they will be starting rookie QB John Beck out ofBYU for the last 7 games I personally believe that if you're going to be in super tank mode, you have no choice but to hire slackers.Overacheivers in this case, are far to detrimental to progress. With Beck's immaturity under center and Ricky taking weed-naps in the backfield the Fish as a franchise are a lock to have both an undefeated and a win-less team.
4. Golden State Warriors - The Sonics and the T-Wolves just set the Warriors up for some serious bragging rights in the future. Both teams snapped their long winless streaks last night with the Sonics riding a balanced effort to overthrow the woeful heat in Dwayne Wade's first game back from shoulder surgery and the Timberwolves feeding off of Rashard McCants 33 point detonation to spoil Ron Artest's return engagement after suspension. Now when the Warriors, get Stephen Jackson back from suspension, realize that their team is loaded with talent and begin their playoff surge starting with a potentially therapeutic East coast road trip, they can feed off of the fact that they were the NBA's last winless team this year.
3. Cowboys, Texans and Horses - Before coaching his team to a victory against the Rockets, Phil Jackson reacting to the swarm of controversy that came about from his calling the Laker's loss to the Spurs a "Brokeback Mountain Game" due to the amount of penetration and kickouts, made a complete mockery of the politically correct apology. Phil said that if he had offended any "Cowboys, Texans or Horses or anybody else that would be offended by the comments, I'd like to apologize." Cowboys, Texans and Horses got their apology and Phil was able to bring levity to the situation due to the fact that the same crowd of reporters laughing hysterically at his comments when they were said would presumably be the group that bands together to persecute him in the media.
2. Lebron James - With his monster 39 point 13 rebound and 13 assist game in an overtime loss against the Magic, Lebron James became the first player to record that many points, rebounds and assists in a game since Wilt Chamberlain in 1968. Lebron has to do everything himself in order for this team to remain competitive. Although I couldn't find any information on the stats that Wilt accrued in the game that he got more points, rebounds and assists, i found some interesting things that Lebron can do to match Wilt that would be equally amazing, yet doable for someone of Lebron's talent. He could get a double triple double, which consists of having 20 or more points, rebounds and assists, or he could have a double quadruple, meaning he could get 40 or more points along with 40 or more rebounds. Or Lebron should just go for the glory and match Wilt's 20,000 number.
1. Tennessee - With top programs falling left and right to inferior competition across the college basketball landscape, it is refreshing to see a good old fashioned stomping out by one of the nations top-ranked schools. The Volunteers, led by transfer Tyler Smith delivered a 57 point (101-44) white-washing of the Arkansas-Monticello Boll Weevils, a division two program, in the first round of the StubHub Legends classic. I suspect that Tennessee coach. Bruce Pearl made threats to his team along the lines of coaching every game in full body paint or having Pat Summit be head cheerleader at all home games to get his team motivated, an example of a coaching being a process, carried over from year to year.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Game of the Weak
tonight's nba schedule features a full and diverse set of games. but there is one in particular that caught my eye. is it dwight howard and the upstart magic facing lebron james' cavaliers? could it be the kobe's lakers taking on the upstart houston rockets? or perhaps it's the upstart celtics looking to extend their record to 7-0 to upstart the season? on any other night, i'd be delighted to watch either of those games, but not tonight. because tonight the 0-8 sonics visit the 1-6 miami heat. robert swift guarding a lethargic shaq? durant versus ricky davis? johan petro guarding a lethargic shaq? dwyane wade's newest suit? nick collison guarding a lethargic shaq? chris wilcox and udonis haslem braiding each other's hair? kurt thomas guarding a lethargic shaq? smush parker and chris quinn as backup point guards? a lethargic shaq? penny hardaway and damien wilkins starting? sign me up twice. uh, just in case my first sign up is misplaced.
the sonics are currently 6-point underdogs, though i think a more appropriate line would be any viewers of this game as a 20-point favorite. but i'm not an oddsmaker, i'm only odd. either way, the heat come into this game 0-3 at home while the sonics have similar 0-4 records at their home and at everyone else's. the average scores of games that the sonics and heat have played so far are opponent - 107.9, sonics - 97.4 and opponent - 89.3, heat - 83.3. so which team can impose its will on the other? specifically, will the sonics lose in an uptempo, high-scoring game or will the heat lose in a stop and go, traffic jam-like game? but before we try to predict what happens tonight, let's examine how each of these teams got here. because as they say, those who forget history are doomed to play mark blount.
the heat's season so far could be best described as "woeful at best". they are currently averaging 3 fewer points than the 2nd lowest scoring team and have only once, in a game against the suns, broke 90 points. last night, the heat lost by 15 to the bobcats. this was the second time charlotte has beaten miami this year and at this rate, the heat will lose to primoz brezec and the bobcats over 23 times this season. the elias sports bureau has confirmed that this would be a league record. and as if things weren't going bad enough, pat riley had this to say about last night's loss:
"I guarantee you I should suit up. I'd play better than some of them right now. I guarantee it. I swear to God. With an old hip and 62 years old and I can't see, I'll play better than some of my guys tonight. Come on, they were pretty bad."
now heat players have to worry about looking over their shoulders for a delusional coach eager to steal their minutes. seriously, if pat riley actually thinks he can play effective basketball right, now not only is he off his rocker, he's off my rocker. if he played himself for five minutes he'd miss 70 shots and turn the ball over 35 times before fouling out and trying to coach his team out of a 450-4 hole in the next three and a half quarters. hopefully that doesn't happen because there is hope for this team. they've allowed the 2nd fewest points in the league up to this point and more importantly, dwyane wade is going to play soon. simple arithemetic says that once the heat add his 27 points per game to their current 83 points per game, they'll average like 110 points a game! so unless the heat are 1-80 by the time wade returns, i like their chances to make the playoffs.the sonics outlook this year is a little less cheery. so far, they've played like a team that was hoping to secure a top two draft pick so they could select kevin durant. bad news sonics, you already drafted kevin durant, he's the guy taking 80% of your team's shots. but with that said, the sonics haven't been as bad as advertised. durant seems to be adjusting well and chris wilcox has been a pleasant surprise. also, if you throw out last night's blowout loss to the magic, they've been highly competitive in every game this year. and if you throw out every game this year, the sonics are undefeated. more seriously, the sonics' biggest problem is their inability to close out games. again, ignoring their last game, through the first three quarters, the average score has been opponents - 80, sonics - 78. in the fourth quarter though, seattle has been generally outscored 28-22. once durant learns how to finish games and once they make a firm decision on their cerberus-like point
guard rotation, the sonics will improve. but looking at seattle's upcoming schedule, if they don't win this game tonight, it's very possible that they don't win a game for another three years as the oklahoma city disorder. though maybe the sonics have been purposely losing with the hope that oklahoma city decides they don't want an nba team. and if that's what it takes to keep basketball in seattle, i hope they never win another game and the sonics trade kevin durant to the wizards for a 2nd round draft pick.anyways, as evident, my excitement over this mediocre game is unreasonably high. my prediction: everyone wins. except for the heat, who lose by 3 because pat riley inserts himself into the starting lineup.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Starbury is AWOL
I hope Knick fans will join me in doing a thorough search of all the back seats of trucks in the Pheonix area along with a thorough sweep of intern's offices. New York Daily News beat writer, Frank Isola has reported on the Stephen A. Smith show in New York, that Stephon Marbury is currently AWOL. He did not report to practice today and the team does not know his whereabouts. After a disappointing loss to the then win-less Miami Heat on Sunday, Isiah Thomas informed his team that players that do not show defensive intensity on the court will see a drastic reduction in playing time. Thomas began this process during the game, as he was obviously also disappointed by Marbury's backup Nate Robinson's as third-stringer Mardy Collins played 21 minutes in his first action of the year. Isola also stated that Mardy Collins will be in the starting lineup tonight as the Knicks begin an important four-game West Coast trip in Phoenix.
Although the Knicks' backcourt defense has been atrocious this year, the teams 2-3 record cannot be placed solely on Marbury's play. However, always a sensitive player it appears that Marbury has taken Isiah's motivation strategies in the wrong way and has reacted in a usual childish matter. When taking over as coach last year, Thomas was forced to build the roster's spirits back up and remove the tire tracks that resulted from Larry Brown constant belittling and under-bus throwing from the previous season. Now Thomas must actually do some more conventional coaching which requires him to take the kid-gloves off and call some players out privately - holding them accountable for their performance and energy level on the court. Although I am the the consummate Marbury apologist, I really can't hold his ego, and immaturity over the team, and if these reports of his alienation from the team are true - I personally think that Isiah and the rest of the Knicks front office would be best served to put Marbury in the corner for an adult time-out until he realizes the errors of his ways or the team has no choice but to buy out his unmanageable contract. Although I'd hate to see Marbury go, it would create a surplus of sexy single interns with nothing to do but maybe get into MY truck.
Today's Best - 11.12.07
5. eric gordon - continuing our coverage of noteworthy college basketball debuts by teenagers who only a year ago were in high school shoving nerds into lockers and attending my super sweet 16 parties, indiana's highly touted freshman guard eric gordon scored 33 points to lead the hoosiers over chattanooga 99-79. gordon's arrival in indiana was surrounded by controversy as he backed out of his committment to illinois after kelvin sampson, and his numerous recruiting violations, became head coach at indiana. regardless of what may or may not have happened, eric gordon is a hoosier and along with his 33 points, he added six rebounds, four assists, three steals, and seven three-pointers. though, "numbers didn't tell the whole story" because eric gordon "ignited indiana's second-half charge". apparently, the associated press doesn't think "second" is a number.
4. ron artest - last night, the kings lost to the jazz in blow out fashion, dropping their record to 2-5 on the season. it was more or less what we've come to expect from the new look kings. beno udrih played 29 minutes, even though statistics have proven that he's most effective for the kings when he plays 15 minutes a game for the other team, mikki moore started in place of an injured brad miller, and the kenny thomas and shareef abdur-rahim one-two punch combined for 30 minutes and zero points on 0-5 shooting. but the only stat that matters to the kings from last night's thriller is managing to push the number of games they've played to seven. because now ron artest is free to return from his suspension to try to prove that he's finally turned over a new leaf. his first game is this wednesday against the timberwolves. expect him to come out gunning as i'm sure in anticipation for this game he's spent the last few weeks hunting wolves.3. jr smith - in the eighth head to head match up between carmelo and lebron, jr smith tried his best to steal the show by scoring 29 points in 24 minutes as the nuggets beat the cavs 122-100. he drained seven of his eight attempts from three, but hit only two of his six attempts from one. though to be fair, jr smith decided to shoot all of his free throws from the other teams' free throw line.
2. any television program that wasn't monday night football - as someone with no vested interest in either team and also as someone who had a comfortable lead in fantasy football coming into tonight, the seahawks-49ers game was painfully uninteresting. but as luck would have it, hbo family was showing galaxy quest. and though i've seen galaxy quest numerous times, i decided that i'd much rather watch tim allen defeat aliens in a farcical comedy for tenth time than watch how bad the nfc west is. consider that while sarris was trying to steal the omega 13 device from the thermians, alex smith was passing for 114 yards. and 45 of these yards came on a hail mary at the end of the 1st half that was ruled a catch despite the fact that arnaz battle clearly bumbled the ball out of bounds. this fake catch was one of only six niner first downs, which actually helped them narrowly avoid matching the meager five first downs the ravens managed last monday night. next monday hopefully will fare a little better when either the broncos host the titans or i host a party to watch dancing with the stars.